Babies Everywhere!

Let’s just open with this, the single greatest thing I’ve ever purchased at a yardsale (note that I say that about everything I purchase):

Oh my god, how horrifying is that? I don’t know what it’s supposed to be, but every time I look at it I see a sneaky Santa Clause giggling to himself and whispering “I have all the babies. I have all of them.” You just know he’s going to eat them afterwards. I can’t wait to serve people cookies on it, come Christmas-time. The look on their face as they take that last chocolate chip away, and they have that staring up at them. The true meaning of the holidays. Continue reading

Xbox Calculator

Yesterday’s haul was a little closer to the “junk” side of things, rather than the inherent utilitarianism of enormous pine cones, or the adorable whimsy of Baby Benjamin Franklin. Not by design, though; this item wants to be useful, but since computers exist, and I’m not a high school student who ever has to do math for any reason*, there’s only sort of a point now. Check it out:

That’s what four scheduled yard sales (plus three blue-light specials**) nabbed me: a calculator in the shape of an Xbox 360 controller. It’s not labeled as such, but that’s definitely, definitely what it is. That’s actually what I love most about it: Usually when you see a generic representation of a modern-day videogame controller, it doesn’t look like anything you’ve ever seen before (and half the time it doesn’t even look like it would work), presumably due to the reason that nobody likes a lawsuit. This guy, though, is clearly an Xbox 360 controller. It even has shoulder buttons. Continue reading