Embarrassing Moments in the Life of Rob Lowe

enter-at-your-own-risk

You can’t say they didn’t warn me.

I’ve talked at length before about how going to estate sales feels more or less like you’re looting a stranger’s home. Everything in the house is basically set up the way they were before the people died; except for the occasional price tag and the herd of re-sellers literally elbowing you out of the way so they can be the first ones to get to Grandma’s fine jewelry, you’d hardly even know that something horrible happened here not too long ago and everyone’s probably really sad about it.

If you look closely you can start to get an idea of the people who lived thereyou see a few books on invasive medical procedures and a pair of scissors that looks like you could carve someone up with it, and—OH GOD, what’s that?! Continue reading

Guest Post: Antique Shopping

(This guest post was submitted by my GameCola co-collaborator and perhaps the world’s most famous Nancy Drew enthusiast, Michael Gray.)

Since Halloween is coming up, I thought it’d be a nice time to talk about yardsaling’s scary cousin: antique shopping.

You can see the family resemblance between antique shopping and yard sales. Both hobbies include sorting through piles of useless old junk that nobody wants anymore. But while yard sales are run by mostly normal people, antique malls are run by complete lunatics. In fact, if you’re ever at a yard sale where the sellers seem crazy, odds are that they’re just trying to impress the antique mall scouts.

You see, antique stores are just like the government. Everyone in charge is over fifty years old, and they have no idea how much things cost. For example, $50 for a Titanic VHS tape is a reasonable price at an antique store. On the other hand, something like an Xbox 360 game will go for two dollars, because the antiquers have no idea what to do with any products made in this century.

I recently visited an antique mall in Normal, Illinois. Conveniently located in a dead shopping center, this store contains proof that their town is poorly named.

This suit would either be a great Halloween costume, or the worst birthday present ever.

About $20 for the creepy salt and pepper shakers. I think the design for them was reused in Gnomeo and Juliet. Continue reading