Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

A chicken crosses the road.

To find great deals, apparently! Hey there, little friend!

Why did the chicken cross the road?

She backed up one lane of traffic by strutting around and waggling her head at people, and I backed up the other by taking pictures of her like I’d only ever heard of these creatures called “hens” before in campfire stories. (“Legend has it that they have gross red things on their faces, and that they shred most excellently on the guitar…”)

Unfortunately, this cock-of-the-walk was one of the more interesting things I saw during this morning’s adventures, although I did find a few other things worth crowing about. For example—remember last week, when I was talking about things you seriously do not want to buy used? Well…

At least it still has its original packaging? Butt wait, it gets better–

Like, not to get too gross here, but…somebody peed in that. Probably the dude running the yardsale. If you’re ever so hard up for cash that you find yourself saying “Hey, I peed on this thing; how much will you pay me for it?”, it might finally be time to crack open those help-wanted ads. Continue reading